Has to be one of the best, if not the best, forms of motorsport.  For some reason it doesn’t seem to have made it to the U.S. and I don’t know why.  Surely seeing footage like this would peak peoples attention.

I received my regular email from apple touting their new products and product accessories. On scanning over the email I had to take a second glance at this piece of back to the future-esk technology.

Apparently by donning this dignity stripping piece of plastic you’ll not only be transported back to the early 80′s and be virtually wearing vibrantly colored jackets with the sleeves rolled up and a piano necktie, but you’ll also be transported into a full surround sound widescreen movie theaterish experience. After you have enjoyed you’re viewing pleasure you will be compelled to throw yourself under the train you are riding on as everybody in the carriage will be pointing at you, laughing and declaring “look at that fuckin TWAT!”.

I mean really…Come on. If you want a real laugh go to the their own site at www.myvu.com. The image in the top right says it all.

What is Apple doing associating themselves with such shite.

Every now and again I get that feeling of missing home. The green hills. The chilly breezes. The pubs. Fish suppers. THEN I see videos like this one to remind me why I really don’t want to go back. Here I am living in New York, constantly portrayed as a hot bed of crime and gang violence.  Sure I hear about someone being shot from time to time.  Sometimes its not far from where I live.  BUT rarely do I ever feel uneasy or scared.  People often ask me why I left Scotland…well here you go.

So a while back I was involved in a pitch at my current job. Being a lowly design monkey, when it came to the presentation they didn’t have a cheesy headshot for me to include in the team breakdown. Not a problem, I almost always have a camera on me and we’re a design agency for gods sake. With camera in hand me and a colleague headed to one of the conference rooms and took a few headshots. Just for a laugh we took a few mock ones of which the one you see to the right was one of them. Well what did they do? THEY FUCKIN USED IT! In the back of a proposal to a large corporation. Needless to say we didn’t get any work from the pitch but I got some folio pieces and a good laugh so I am happy.

So I share an office with 2 other people at work. One is fine, talks to himself sometimes but other than that is normal. The other guy is quite a bit older than us young ones and has many quirks. One of the most annoying traits is his need to use technology from the 80′s. I remember the days when people were all about ergonomics and fighting various forms of strain. Personally I think the attempts to overcome these problems are rather overworked to a geeky tech level that strips the products of all character and friendliness. Anyway, back to the co-worker. He works on a PC and uses one of these comical ergonomic keyboards. I think he likes it a lot and has brought it with him to every job he has worked at since the 80′s. The thinh is dirty and looks pretty worn. It also obviously comes from the days when keys had to be hammered into the desk to get them to respond. As a result our office sounds like the West Bank every day. We sit in what sounds like a battlefield and people flinch and duck as they walk past our door. The thing is fucking ridiculous.

In our attempts to quash this perpetual noise pollution, we did some surfing around looking for soft touch keyboards. Ergonomic ones that didn’t look like they were developed in a prosthetic department of a hospital were few and far between. We did however find this soft touch keyboard and, on reading the ad, found myself in fits of laughter. Their description of these old keyboards obviously hit a nerve with us and I find it to be the best description of an old keyboard and its user.

“We seriously don’t know how you IBM keyboard lovers get any work done when it sounds like Optimus Prime pleasuring himself with a jackhammer.”

Still makes me laugh. Love it.

So I got up this morning and the place was white. Considering we had a day of 60˚ temperatures on Monday this was pretty astonishing and, for me, came without warning. Its pretty neat to see the city all white in the morning as the cars and people haven’t had a chance to turn the roads in to brown slush or sweep all of the clean snow off of the sidewalk. It also seems to make the commute into work much easier as I am sure some people get up and don’t even bother they’re arse to get out of bed to even attempt it. As a result I snagged a seat on the D express train down here and got in early enough to snap a few photos out of the office window.

Now I am setting myself up for another fairly boring day of doing not very much. At least its friday.

So I am bemused every morning by the sheer size of some people who gladly ride the subway taking up as much space as they like every morning. Concessions should be made for these people. They should be allowed to work at odd times, through the night maybe. This will stop them from monopolizing our comfort in the mornings by keeping them out of peak traffic. I also propose that they build “Fat Turnstiles” that charge people falling into the category of “Fat Bastards” double the amount the rest of us have to pay. Maybe they are charged in food. That would either discourage them from using the subway cos they love eating so much, OR maybe slim them down by them having to give up on their little luxuries like Pizzas the size of coffee tables.

I have to say, there is one woman (i think) who gets on my train in the mornings and when she walks over to a seat and sits down she doesn’t change position at all. Her fat ass props her up on the seat at the same height as she is standing. She needs to be paying double or triple the regular passenger AT LEAST. Maybe then the bloody MTA can make there money rather than subjecting us to fare hikes again and again.